Vo jo aaye to khush mere ghar ke deewar-o-dar mile..
Aaine ko bhi shayad kuchh khush-bakht manzar mile.
Baithkar saamne poochha zamaane bhar ka haal..
Vo mile to humse magar.. humii.n se bekhabar mile.
Poochhi.n aakhiri mulaqaat ki jab yaadein usne..
Main kya batlata mujhe to khwabo.n mein aksar mile.
Unki aankhon se hua karta tha waqt ka asl andaazaa..
arse baad vo aankh mile ab.. barson baad nazar mile.
Likhun aur kyun main ghazal ab uske naam par..
Na ziyadaah waqt hai.. na sahii maqta-o-beher mile.
April 3, 2007
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13 comments:
aisa lagta hai [adke ki apko ye likhte hue kafi khushi hui :)
I liked the idea of the poem. I'd want to write a poem with the same idea sometime. I hope this feeling is not copyrighted! I'd surely acknowledge though!
Awesome...Awesome...Awesome
fod daala...
[Phoenix]
Haan, sach mein.. :)
Aur comment padke is baat ki khushi hui ki saare keyboards ek jaise hote hain :P (First I tried hard to co-relate 'ladke' and 'aap'!)
[V]
Oh go ahead plz..I'd love to read that. Most feelings are universal.
[;)]
Many thanks ;)
[211821]
This thin!! Hope you r not anorexic :P
Wow! I cant believe its you writing all this! You've taken a giant leap, I must say!
The ones that end with 'khush-bakht manzar', 'nazar' and 'maqta-o-beher' were too good! I'm impressed, honestly!
Zindagi mein is tarah kuch badlaav* muqarrar hue
Humse na milenge ab woh humse agar mile
* Is there a nice urdu counterpart for 'badlaav'?
"arse baad vo aankh mile ab.. barson baad nazar mile."
.....beautiful...its a cliched word..but i can't think of anything else..hope it conveys all my feelings on reading dese lines
IIT sure is full of talents....n not just in d field of technology....u always wanted to be an engg...never anything else??
"Aaine ko bhi shayad kuchh khush-bakht manzar mile." Wah!
"Likhun aur kyun main ghazal ab uske naam par..
Na ziyadaah waqt hai.. na sahii maqta-o-beher mile." Wah again! witty and with humor! ever noticed that many good shayars display a sense of humor in their works~ even when talking of the tragic.
Have to agree with Tap that your Urdu is on the upswing!
[Tap]
Thanx a lot!
Nice she'r by urself. Don't know why but I liked it more than the rephrased one u posted on ur blog..
[Desperado]
Thanx..
We dont have many options with words, right?
I've never been enthusiatic about engg but poetry can't earn u money (nor I've wanted it to). Good as a hobby, just that.
[Siyaah]
Thanx! Haven't read much of urdu poetry (not even conversant with Urdu script) but yeah, have come across a few such instances. Sometimes the humor accentuates the tragedy.
Thanx again for you encouraging words.
Wow, you've got a phodu Urdu. I don't much read and appreciate shayari and stuff but I really enjoyed your piece.
Went thru sm of ur poems..dey seem to follow a chronology of events.. ??.. :P
I added a note to yesterday's she'r today. And now tell me which version is better (A candid opinion is most welcome).
[Akshay]
Kuchh khas nahi hai yaar, I know.
I too don't read much.. it's thru listening some simple ghazals tht I've got a taste for it.
[Eyelid]
Miss Eyelid (I'm sure guys won't pick up this nick), u did't tell me if we know each other.. ur comments make me feel like that.
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